Book Review - Getting Past No
Book Review - Getting Past No (William Ury)
Starting to Getting Past No
I started reading this book “Getting Past No” as part of my Conflict & Negotiation course assignment. William Ury is the author of this book who has previously co-authored the book on “Getting to Yes” with Roger Fisher. Before I started reading this book, I wanted to get an overview of this book; I turned to the back-cover followed by the author’s note. The back-cover of this book asks questions on how to get past no and presents strategies on getting to yes. Author’s note makes a start by explaining the seeds behind the book concept. Author has tried to answer two important questions in this book, how can one turn confrontation in to cooperation? And how can one transform conflicts to be fought in to problems to be solved?
Interestingly author goes on to explain how cooperation is important in family, business and global environment. He stresses on the fact that court cases and war is not the answer to conflict resolution. Courts and war are highly expensive solutions and doesn’t necessarily provide a solution to acute conflicts. This book has been classified in to 3 sections. First section “Getting ready” focuses on how to be prepared before going to negotiate. Second section “Using the Breakthrough Strategy” explains 5 key strategies that can be employed to achieve a mutually acceptable/negotiated solution to a conflict.
Final chapter “Turning Adversaries into Partners” looks at how to turn adversaries in to partners.
Breaking Through Barriers to Cooperation
William starts with an Italian diplomat’s quote “Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way”. How true it is, in our day to day life we constantly negotiate to reach a mutually agreed solution. There are times when we have an upper hand and other time we don’t. Author explains negotiations as a process of back and forth communication aimed at reaching agreement with others when some of your interests are shared and some are opposed. William identifies the following 5 behaviors as the barriers to cooperation.
- Your Reaction
- Their Emotion
- Their Position
- Their Dissatisfaction
- Their Power
Joint Problem Solving
This is a process in which you move away from the position and focus more on the interests. This way negotiation process moves from opposite to side by side. When the person shifts to the other side they see the interests of each side. Thus if a person negotiates with a manager for a promotion focuses more on the interests (Tuition fee, 401k, health care plan, etc,) instead of the position he might want. Joint problem solving helps the negotiations process by reducing the time and energy spent on posturing. Also it improves the work relationship by mutually benefiting each party.
Breakthrough Negotiation
William Ury provides the following five step strategy to counter the barriers to cooperation.
| Barriers to Cooperation | Breakthrough Negotiation |
| Your Reaction | Go to the balcony |
| Their Emotion | Step to their Side |
| Their Position | Reframe |
| Their Dissatisfaction | Build them a golden bridge |
| Their Power | Use power to educate |
William Ury gives an analogy of sailing to explain the principles of breakthrough negotiation. I have some experience in sailing a J24 in which primary strategy to reach the goal was to take a zigzag position. This is important in sailing as traveling straight to destination would be doomed failure. Following the flow of the wind and ensuring that strong winds, tides, reefs, shoals, storms and squalls are handled in the process. Similarly breakthrough negotiation has different stages and each stage needs to be handled with a unique approach. Ury explains the importance of breakthrough negotiator as “Your single greatest opportunity is to change the game. Instead of playing their way let them have your way”. Breakthrough negotiators treat their opponents as the negotiating partners who are presenting an opportunity to reach a mutually satisfactory agreement.
Preparation – Key to Success
This books talks in detail on why preparation is mandatory for an effective negotiation. It charts out a plan for a negotiator to reach a mutually agreeable conclusion. Identify interests for both the parties, what are options involved for those interests. Create a set of standards to resolve the differences fairly, alternatives to negotiation and proposals for agreement.
Go to the balcony
Human beings are reaction machines. When a human being is confronted most natural tendency is to react without thinking. We react by striking back, giving in or breaking off. Dangers of reacting without thinking to a situation are we start to loose sight of our interests. By reacting we become the part of the problem. Ury says we get in to a vicious cycle of action and reaction, but the power to break this cycle is with us. Mind can be controlled; it doesn’t have to follow the
Step to their Side
Going to the balcony has helped a negotiator to regain a mental balance; next step is to help the other side regain theirs. Important challenge here is how one can create a favorable climate in which one can negotiate. Outcome of this exercise is to ensure that one is treated as a human being. Control the emotional aspects and make sure that the other side understands your view point even though they may not like it.
Key secret to disarm is surprise, when they are expecting to attack step to their side, acknowledge their issues and feelings, hear them out, paraphrase and ask for corrections. Acknowledge the person, by doing so you are creating what psychologists call “cognitive dissonance” and inconsistency between perception and reality.
Reframe
Author names this chapter as “To Change the Game Change the Frame”. To change the negotiation game, try changing the frame. Do the opposite of what you may feel tempted to do. Treat your opponent as a partner. Try reframing the opponents view; it is a golden opportunity to understand the problems of the opponent.
Build them a Golden Bridge
This is the phase when a negotiator is ready to sign the agreement. A negotiator has ensured that he/she suspended the reactions, defused other side’s emotions and reframed their position. Still there could be issues; final barrier could be other side’s dissatisfaction. Building a golden bridge doesn’t necessarily mean creating a great proposal but it also involves the other side’s involvement and participation in the agreement. Second it means that we need to move from the obvious interests i.e. money and move towards the intangible needs such as recognition, relationship, etc, also it means that the opposite side feels they have achieved a victory.
Use Power to Educate
Exercising power is an integral part of problem-solving negotiation. Use the power to bring the other side to the table. Instead of seeking victory, aim for mutual satisfaction. Use power to bring them to their senses and not to their knees.
Conclusion: Turning Adversaries in to Partners
Authors conclude by saying “Breakthrough negotiation is hard work. Successful negotiators are patient and persistent. Progress comes gradually. Small breakthroughs can add up to a major breakthrough. In the end even negotiations that once seemed impossible can often yield a mutually satisfactory agreement.
Getting To Yes – Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In
Book Review - Getting To Yes
Introduction
This paper is a reflection of the book “Getting To YES” written by authors Roger Fisher and William Ury. This book was written based on a question “What is the best way for people to deal with their differences”. How two or more entities that are involved in a conflict could amicably reach a mutually satisfying agreement without feeling that one of them gave in.
Book Framework
Book starts with an introduction to Negotiation, need for negotiation. It looks at the fundamental problems in classical negotiation. In the first section it explains why one should not bargain over position. In the next chapter it goes on to define methods to separate people from the problem. Explains why one should focus on interests and not on positions. Negotiator should take time to invent options for mutual gain and should insist on using objective criteria. All the above mentioned methods would help a negotiator reach a mutually satisfying agreement. In the final section authors look at three important questions that often come to our mind. What If the other party doesn’t play by the rule or more powerful or it uses dirty tricks.
Don’t Bargain over Position
This chapter looks at the ill effects of a positional bargain. In this situation the parties involved in a conflict takes a position and starts arguing for their position. There is a considerable amount of haggling before an agreement can be reached, wasting considerable time and energy. A positional bargain fails to meet the basic criteria of producing a wise agreement, efficiently and amicably. Reasons attributed to failure of this method are overlooking the concerns related to the negotiator and primarily focusing on the position. Some of the examples cited are failed negotiation between president JFK and
In this strategy both the parties tries to win and they do not look at the interests of both. This strategy could lead to strained relationship, increased time to complete an agreement and makes the process highly impossible when more than two parties are involved. Thus authors recommend against the use of positional bargaining. They also introduce the difference between soft and hard bargaining. Playing the soft game gives undue advantage to someone who is playing the hard game.
Alternative to Positional Bargaining Strategy
Which game should we play – Soft or Hard? Answer to the question is neither. Try changing the game. Authors are introducing an alternative to the positional bargaining strategy which is a method of negotiation explicit designed to produce wise outcomes efficiently and amicably. This is called “principled negotiation” or “negotiation on the merits”. It defines the straight forward negotiation which can be used under any circumstances. Following points deals with the basic elements of negotiation, and suggests what you should do about it.
ü People: Separate the people from the problem
ü Interest: Focus on interests and not positions
ü Options: Generate a variety of options before deciding what to do
ü Criteria: Insist that the result be based on some objective standard
Separate the people from the Problem
In this chapter authors explain why separating the people from the problem is rather important. Human beings are an emotional package. They react to circumstances differently. This human aspect can be either helpful or disaster for the negotiating outcome. It is important to separate the relationship aspect from the substance. It is important to understand what the other side thinks, their perception and most importantly putting yourself in their shoes. Try to break the perceptions by acting inconsistently with the perceptions. For e.g. In 1977
Focus on Interests, Not on Positions
Fundamental problem in negotiation does not lie in conflicting position, instead it is in the negotiators needs, desires, concerns and fears. Understanding the parties interest would help to come up with an amicable solution. Interests motivate people; they are the silent movers behind the hubbub of positions.
Behind each opposition conflict there lays sharable, compatible and conflicting interests. Authors explain this theory using a real estate rental analogy. Understanding the interests would open up the options available for negotiating a conflict. Clearly communicating the interests would help the opposite party look at things as you see. Acknowledge the interests of others as problems; try to look forward and do not bring past issues when evaluating a future or present deal, be concrete but flexible. Finally authors ask one to be soft on the people but hard on the problem.
Invent Options for Mutual Gains
Many negotiations involve four major obstacles that prevent identifying the available options. They are premature judgment, trying to search for a single answer, assumption of a fixed pie and finally thinking that “solving their problem is their problem”. To invent creative options authors prescribe the following strategies. Separate the act of inventing options from the act of judging them; To broaden the options at the table rather than looking at a single answer; To search for mutual gains and finally to invent ways of making their decisions easy.
Insist on Using Objective Criteria
This chapter focuses on how to create a solution based on principles and doesn’t base on people’s mettle. Principled negotiation produces wise agreements amicably and efficiently. Chapter goes in detailing the process of developing objective criteria, and how one can use them in negotiating. Following standards should be used as and when it is available; Market value, precedent, scientific judgment, professional standards, government regulations, moral standards, equal treatment, tradition, reciprocity and costs.
In addition authors provide three ways to use the objective criteria and procedures. Frame each issue as a joint search for objective criteria, Reason and be open to reason on which standard is appropriate, and never yield to pressure but only to principle.
What if They Are More Powerful?
In this chapter authors introduce a concept named BATNA – (Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement). It is important to understand the concept of bargaining power. More the bargaining power more leverage does one side have. It doesn’t matter you talk about interests, options and standards if the other side has a stronger bargaining power. BATNA is the standard against which any proposed agreement should be measured. Having a good BATNA would help negotiating on merits instead of position. Having a good BATNA provides an easy means to walk away and highly improves the present negotiating situation.
What if They Won’t Play?
If the opposing side doesn’t want to talk about standards, interests or even merits and doesn’t want to play the game then following the three basic approaches would help the opponents focus on the merits. First step focuses on what should do and second step focuses on what others may do, this counters the basic moves of positional bargaining and directs their attention towards the merits, this strategy is called negotiation jujitsu. Final step involves what the third party can do, if first two options doesn’t work try involving a third party who is trained to focus on interests, standards and criteria.
What if They Use Dirty Tricks?
Principle negotiation is great, but what happens when the opposite party tries to derail you or worse case he tries to increase the demand at the verge of an agreement. This chapter looks means by which we can counter the opponent by applying four principles of following the interests, standards, options and criteria. It is important to be able to understand the psychological warfare an
Conclusion
Authors conclude by saying negotiation is not about winning but it is about how you capture the ultimate price which is winning on merits. Principled negotiation will produce over the long run substantive outcomes as good as or better than you are likely to obtain using any other negotiation strategy.
